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Attraction Isn
 

Attraction Isn

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Introduction
A hundred years ago Sigmund Freud, the father of modern psychology,
said that there was one question that he couldnt answer: What do women
want? My opinion is that old Sigmund was asking the wrong question. He
was thinking about the situation all wrong. The question isnt What do
women want?, but What do women RESPOND to?
Everyone knows that if you ask a woman What do you want in a guy?
shell answer with something like, I want a NICE guy who comes from a
good family honest, stable, dependable etc. Right? But we also know
that a lot of really attractive women on this planet seem to be found with
guys who are exactly the opposite. Lets look at some of the top models of
all time. Why is it that all the super-models seem to date violent, drugaddicted,
unstable, wild rock stars? And why is it that every attractive
woman that has ever been interviewed in history has admitted to being
attracted to bad boys? I think you get the picture.
My point is that theres a HUGE difference between what women say they
want and what women are attracted to. Women have many conflicting drives
going on inside. And in many cases women RESPOND to completely illogical
things which are often very different than what they say that they want.
The question that I am going to attempt to solve in this book is, How can I
make women feel this attraction that they feel for bad boys without having
to be an abusive jerk?
When I first started studying this particular area, I was really fascinated
with this concept of women liking jerks but not nice guys. It has always
struck me as very interesting even from a young age. When I was
younger, I never had any success with girls.
In middle school and high school, I wasn't one of the kids that got notes
from girls. I didn't socialize with girls at the dances. And I never had a
girlfriend (I know... boo-hoo for me).
I didn't have my first girlfriend until I was 18. I always just kind of
assumed that I wasn't attractive to women and just silently worshipped
them from afar. I'll tell you, back then I would have done ANYTHING to have
a girlfriend. But the more years that went by without one, the less likely it
seemed.
In any event, I met a girl when I was 18...
She was unstable and came from the most bizarre, dysfunctional alcoholic
family... and was just the co-dependent, needs-a-guy-to-"save"-her projectthat I thought I wanted.
Well, over the next 8 or 9 years I had about 5 or 6 girlfriends. They were
mostly great women, but I now realize that I got into relationships with
them because I DIDN'T THINK THAT I HAD ANY OTHER OPTIONS.
Whenever I was single, I always had a very lonely, insecure feeling that
created desperation to find a woman who would be with me. Then, when I
found one, I would cling to them instantly, hoping that they would love me.
About 5 years ago, I had just moved to Southern California to be closer
to the company for which I worked. Shortly after moving, I quit that job,
and I broke up with my long-distance girlfriend.
So here I was, in my late 20s, in a new place with no friends and no
girlfriend... with that same lonely, unsure feeling that I always got when
I was single.
I made the decision that it was time to get this part of my life handled. I
wanted to figure out how to be successful with women and dating so that I
wouldn't be so insecure anymore.
I didn't like the idea that I could be out in public, see a woman that I'd
like to meet, but have no idea what to do to meet her. I didn't like the idea
that I had to feel fortunate when a woman liked me... but that I had no
control over which women liked me and when I could approach them.
So, being the kind of guy I am, I decided to do something about it once
and for all.
I made a commitment to myself that I was going to do whatever it took
to get this handled. I started reading books, going to seminars, listening to
tapes, and searching the Internet for ideas.
At first, I was excited because there seemed to be quite a bit of good
books available on the topic. But the more techniques I tried, the more I
began to realize that none of the methods being sold out there were quite as
good as the authors claimed.
After literally a couple of years of trying different things, I finally shifted
course. I started watching what guys who were successful with women did in
real-world situations, and I started asking them for help. This is when things
all started to happen for me.

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